Well, today had one highlight, but the rest was pretty much crap. Between Miguel's brothers ripping us off of at least $50 and Miguel acting like a 3 year old, it kind of ruined what could have been a nice day at the beach. The beach part was nice, but everything else sucked so much that it made my overall day really crappy.
Let me just start with this. Miguel's boys from his previous marriage spend every summer with Miguel's mother in South Texas. They live with their mother in Dallas, and the drive from Dallas to Miguel's mom's house is probably 10 hours or so. With the price of gas standing where it is, that's no small amount of change to make that trip happen. Usually, Miguel doesn't even get to see his boys. He usually sends someone else to pick them up and then that person takes them straight to grandma's house without even stopping here to see their dad. So who benefits from this? His ex-wife because she gets three months of free babysitting and still gets child support checks even though she doesn't have to take care of any kids, and his mom because, like any good grandma, she loves having her grandsons over. Yet, for some reason, it's always Miguel's job to pay for EVERY aspect of EVERY trip that they make. Both ways. I think it's freakin ridiculous. Surely his stupid ex can cough up a few bucks for gas or snacks or something. But no. If he asks her to pay for any part of the trip, she won't do it, and then the boys won't get to see their grandma and she'll tell them that it's all their dad's fault. Miguel doesn't want to be the bad guy, so he always pays for it, and then I end up living off credit cards to make up for it.
So this summer I tried to talk some sense into Miguel, but it didn't work. His brother's volunteered to take MY car to go pick up his boys since Miguel just finished driving 18 or so hours to get here and because Miguel's a big baby and just doesn't want to see his ex for the whole 10 minutes it takes to pick up his boys from her house. So I figured what the trip would cost with gas at $3.25 a gallon (quite an over estimate since gas is only $2.91 here now) and sent them with $10 extra what gas would have been if they had to pay that price, as well as $35 for food. Well, they started off the trip with 3/4 tank of gas. They didn't buy any food for the boys on the 8 hour drive down here. Guess what? They didn't return any money. They should have at AT LEAST $50 left over. So Miguel called them this morning and asked if there was any money left over. They claimed there was only $20 left over and that they already spent it. First of all, even if that's all there was left over, you don't just assume that it's yours to keep. Second of all, you don't lie about it. At this point, we didn't know they hadn't fed they boys, and we hadn't put much thought into it. After we did some math and the kids told us they didn't buy them any food, Miguel called his brother back to find out how much was really left over. This time, he claimed there was $45 left over and that they spent most of it on beer already, and then he got mad about it. He basically stole $50 from us, and got mad at Miguel for asking about it. I am so sick of his freaking family. Why do they have to steal and lie and lack the ability to plan for things? So Miguel asked if he could at least get $15 or $20 back. His brother said he'd drop it off today. He didn't.
So usually when I gripe about Miguel's family, I end it off by saying how it's worth is for Miguel. Well, I'm not feeling that today. Miguel has been showing just as much maturity as the rest of his family. Honestly, his two little boys who are 7 and 6 years old are more mature than him. They've been here for about 24 hours now and I haven't seem them throw one fit or even whine about anything. Yesterday I had him make a list, and I went grocery shopping. I got everything he put on the list. When I go grocery shopping, it's usually about $50. With all his crap, it was over $100. So we were stocked up. Yet, right after eating some tacos here, he kept whining that he wanted fajitas. I was in the middle of tiling the last part of the kitchen. And he just wouldn't let it go. And of course he couldn't take himself because he'd been drinking all day and couldn't drive. This was really frustrating because I'd just dropped $110 for food, yet here he is asking me to drop everything and go buy him some more food. I put up with his nagging until I was tired of tiling, and then I got him some freaking tacos after explaining to him that this was the last time. This was a treat, and this was the last time. His one meal was $10. Do you know how much food I can get at the grocery store for $10? And today he did the same damn thing when he wanted a 6 pack of beer for the beach. And then after drinking the 6 pack, he wanted to take the car and go get $20 out of his account so he could get something illegal to smoke. We had literally just got inside from the beach and he was trying to get the keys from me. I told him I would go if he'd take Chloe out her car seat and help everyone get washed up from the beach. He wasn't willing to do that. I was about to lose it. So I took Chloe with me to get his stupid money. He didn't have enough money in his account, so I had to get it from mine. I called him up furious. He didn't even care. He couldn't wait 5 minutes for me to unpack the car. He wouldn't take no for an answer. If I refused, he would have literally sulked and whined all day, just like a freaking kid. By the time I got home, Chloe was asleep. I threw his stupid money at him and I took a shower and went to bed. He hasn't apologized. The past two days have not been enjoyable at all. I'm getting worried that I've gotten used to living on my own and the idea of having Miguel with me is better than the reality of it. If this is the way it's going to be, then I want no part in it. There comes a time when you need to grow up. When I met Miguel, I was in the college state of mind and all about experimentation and fun. Well guess what? I have a kid now, I'm graduating soon, and it's time to set an example and be an adult. That means no more heavy drinking, no drugs, etc. Since I was ok with what Miguel did when we met, he just assumes that I'm ok with it now. Well I'm not. Now we have kids and a mortgage and car payments, etc. It's time to grow up and set an example. Apparently I'm the only one who feels that way. This whole thing just sucks. Until two days ago, I thought everything was great. Now my world seems to be falling apart. I thought I had everything together, but it turns out I give in too easily and I'm not happy. I keep thinking that if I move the family back to Idaho, it'll get better. I won't have to deal with his family, and he'll be away from easy access to illegal substances, and maybe he'll finally grow up. But what if he doesn't? What if I spend years trying to get him to stop his crappy habits and it doesn't work. They still sell beer in Idaho. Something has got to change, because I don't want to live my life like this.
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